You Have Stolen My Heart
by Ideas 'R' Us
Summary: This is about the week that Bella and Charlie don't talk about. It is all Bella's POV. Please read and review.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: So, I had this long AN typed up, but my computer ate it. So, don't flame me, but I appreciate C/C. This isn't my first fanfic, just my first for this site. ;) More is coming dearies, I'm not sure where it's going yet.**

**Fortunately, I don't own Twilight, else it would suck as badly as this. XD Yeah, it's all Stephenie's. Oh, and the lyrics are Dashboard Confessional - Stolen. 3**

I don't know why.

My hair tumbled across my pillow, and I felt numb. That's what frightened me most, the feeling of numbness, the feeling of nothing, the eternal void. The tears slid glittering down my cheeks, absorbed by my already damp pillow.

It was worst in the morning. When I didn't feel his touch, or hear his voice. The very things that had been my very existence for so long. If I closed my eyes, I could almost see his face, but it was always contorted in a cold mask, not the face I had loved - still love - so much. A small sob shook my chest, and I rolled onto my side, not bothering to wipe the tears that dripped off my nose onto the hardwood floor.

I don't know how long I lay there, trying to think of nothing. I'm such a hypocrite. I say I feared the nothingness, yet I strived for thinking of nothing. Which was worse, the nothingness or the pain? To this day, I still can't answer that question.

At some point I must have fallen asleep, and I was awoken by a loud thud and pain shooting down my side, I had fallen out of bed. I rolled onto my back, not bothering to check the bruises that I was sure to have, or the wet spot by my arm. It seemed that Charlie hadn't heard, since he hadn't come running up the stairs. Again. If I had had it in my heart to be amused, I would've been amused. He seemed to think he could do something for me. It was laughable. I closed my eyes again, hopefully sleep would bring relief.

Yet, I knew that it would be the farthest thing from relief. The dream. As usual, I clawed my way through the forest, searching, searching. What was I searching for? What is there to search for? Why would I search?

I could feel it coming, I could feel myself tense to jerk awake, even in my dream, but I didn't have the strength to wake up before it happened. Then, there came the answer. There was nothing to search for, I wasn't searching for anything. All that greeted me was the void of nothingness.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: So, I know this isn't how it goes in the book, but I kind of forgot about the part where her mom comes and she flips out. And I had already written it, so, yeah. XD**

And, as usual, I woke up screaming, the cold realization that no one cared, no one knew why. Because there was no reason. There is no answer to the whys. It was as if, when he had left, my heart had been torn out and left bleeding on the floor. Except, I couldn't find it, so there was a hole leaving me wide open and vulnerable.

My voice was starting to go hoarse, and I started to shudder. The nothing of the dream seemed to be creeping into real life, and it was freezing over me. At first I tried to fight it, but the cold, the nothingness, entranced me. I was like a deer caught in the headlights, mesmerized. Charlie stood at the door watching me, saying nothing. He seemed to see that something had happened, that I had made a decision.

The nothingness washed over me, and I was gone. In those seconds, I could see his face frozen in perfect clarity. Then it was gone.

I stood up fluidly, brushing past Charlie and into the bathroom. I picked up my hairbrush, and mechanically tugged through my tangled hair. I tried not to look at my reflection in the mirror. My face was pallid, and my eyes were sunken and blank. My dark hair tangled around my head, and I kept at the rats' nest that had been developing.

Charlie was still watching me, and he finally spoke, "Bells?" My head stopped brushing for a moment, and I turned to face him, "Yes Dad?" He was staggered, my voice was flat, not one note of hysteria or anguish. I was good at this game. Maybe I would live, maybe I could survive without him, if I didn't have any feelings at all.

This felt better, I could live through this. The icy numbness that held me was almost comforting, I didn't have to think. I didn't have to remember. I didn't have to forget. I could just be.

"Err... Nothing." Charlie murmured, and after watching me for a few seconds more, he turned and walked down the stairs. He must have been confused. Now that I think back on it, I think that Charlie was more terrified by the sudden change, rather than my coma like state in the beginning. At least then, my position had been obvious, I had been in pain, I didn't want to talk about it, and I just wanted to cry in peace.

After that, it was unclear. I wasn't even sure myself, I was so afraid of remember, yet I was too much of a wimp to forget. His face, his hands, his _eyes_ had made such a lasting impression on me, if I forgot them,


End file.
